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Power
Another visual piece. I was manic when I wrote this. It was again a sudden image in my head which I felt compelled to record. So I sat down and began to perfect the paragraph, until I felt I had gotten it exactly the way I wanted it. Looking back on it there are a number of ways I feel that I can interpret this. But at the core of each translation is the following theme: I was not in control of myself when I wrote this, nor am I truly in control of myself when I am manic. That's why I so desperately wanted the illusion of power. My ultimate fantasy—the power to control [myself].

6/19/2000
From his ten fingertips shone ten shafts of white light. They splashed against the stone wall in front of him, and soon cracks began to crawl from one side of the rock face to the other. They began to accelerate, drawing a web of small fissures which crept ever-deeper into the mountainside. Soon, the stress of the light's push caused huge chunks of stone to tumble off the side of the mountain, rolling down the steep incline at incredible speeds and slamming into the hard dirt at the foot of the mountain and crumbling in a cloud of dust. Bigger slabs of the dense stone began to slip away from the mountain, lit by the back-glow of the light's relentless push, falling and churning up huge brown geysers of dirt with their deafening smash into the ground. Seconds later, the entire mountain began to glow a soft, dim white. The man opened his mouth, and with a scream so loud that it silenced the rocks' falls, a cylinder of twirling blue water loosed from the palms of his hands and exquisite red fire flared out his eyes, blasted onto the mountainside. The enormous rock in front of him shed gigantic boulders which plummeted towards the Earth, giving way to gravity's pull, and rolled past him. The mountain began to tremble and shudder. Then it splintered, fragmented by the deep fissures, and finally collapsed.

The man roared. "I am power!" he yelled at the billowing dust which now replaced the mountain. "Bow and surrender to my might." And the dust settled gently on the ground.

^ Top Bipolar Disorder - Ups and Downs