Lying is the best and often also the most ethical way to get a job.

For $150, this guy bought a fake résumé & callable references in an industry he’s never worked in. And got hired:

For a small fee, CareerExcuse.com promises to not only craft an elaborate lie based on your exact job specifications but to see it through for as long as necessary. The site will provide a live HR operator and staged supervisor, along with building and hosting a virtual company website—complete with a local phone number and toll-free fax. CareerExcuse will even go so far as to make the fake business show up on Google Maps.

William Schmidt started the site in 2009, after being let go from his job in a round of layoffs during the lowest depths of the recession.

“While we were all unemployed, a couple of my former coworkers asked me to act as their reference for job interviews,” Schmidt recalled. “I did it for free for my friends, but then I realized that this is some there’s a pretty big demand for. It was something I could take to the public.”

He was right. Within the first 24 hours of launching the CareerExcuse site, Schmidt had already received multiple order for his services. He’s quick to brush off ethical concerns, citing horror stories from his clients about being mistreated by their former employers (and thus being unable to acquire a reference) and noting that it becomes more difficult to land a job the longer someone’s been unemployed.

Employment is a racket. So is college.

I dropped out of middle school and never went back to any educational institution, because they’re liars and thieves. All “employable” skills I have I learned while on the very same jobs that I told my hiring managers I already knew how to do, but didn’t until after I got hired, of course.

My first job was in telemarketing, and I was terrible because I spent most of my time trying to find ways around the Windows kiosk so I could play minesweeper. Then they “promoted” me to the office, and I automated my admin assistant job to the point of the push of a button. I’d come to work, press my “do my job” button, and spend the rest of my day reading programming books and learning about Web servers.

I never told my boss that I had automated my job. Why would I? Jobs are intended to take the one thing that’s most valuable away from you: your time.

Eventually, of course, my bosses were finally so impressed with my “efficiency” that they wanted to promote me to an Assistant Database Administrator position with the actual IT department of the company, as opposed to the administrative office assistant position. They thought they were offering me something awesome: a decent raise and a lot more “challenging work.” So, obviously, when presented with the promotion opportunity, I quit on the spot.

The look of surprise on their faces was absolutely priceless.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Now I live out of my car because I recognize that jobs are fundamentally unethical and coercive way of organizing human labor. Jobs are what people do when they are being crushed by the system. Jobs don’t produce social value. They’re a starvation mitigation strategy.

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