I feel like I’m drowning…like falling into black ooze.
“I want to not have to worry about money, ever.”
As I walked on West 4th, parallel to Bleeker, I kept seeing flashbacks to all the times in my life I had walked these same streets before. I saw ghosts of myself beside me and in front of me, laughing, walking, talking, joking, rushing from place to place as I knew I had in the past.
Super-brief reflections on the past few days, mostly centering around the fact that I want to get work done and haven’t been able to at all. It’s frustrating, it’s troubling, and I don’t really know what to do about it.
Exhausted by hours of crying together with Danica, and worn down by her continuous begging to reconsider ending the relationship, the rest of the day is spent in unnecessary turmoil after we have sex. Most of this entry is taken from an email I sent out when I awoke in the middle of the night after she had gone.
It has been happening all day; an unshakable feeling of fogginess, lack of conecntration, the inability to to clear my head or focus my eyesight. Everything seems unsteady, shaky, vulnerable to some form of toxic gas or radioactivity that would permeate everything. Dread, heavyness, and confusion have been the only certain things today. And I […]
Safari is still my main browser on the Mac. It has this feature which integrates it into Apple’s Address Book and provides a drop down list of all your contacts whom you have specified Web pages for. Well, there are very few people in my address book without web pages of some kind. Most of […]
This morning, after getting myself out of bed I vacuumed the kitchen floor and the area around the bed. It’s quite remarkable how much that improves my quality of life. The only reason I didn’t do it sooner was because it seemed like an impossible task. In reality, it took two minutes. Becky wrote about […]